This has been a crazy week. Crazy as in: 1) Staying up late every night for days on end painting, repairing, caulking, cleaning and packing because the real estate photographer comes Thursday, the movers come Saturday (for the first load), and the house goes on the market Monday. 2) Scrambling to stay literally one room ahead of […]

We gave birth and said goodbye to our tiny baby boy, Luke Allen, one year ago today. I’m usually surprised at how short a year seems when looking back on events, but this time I’m surprised it’s only been a year. It feels like Luke has been part of our life much longer. The rocks […]

What makes a man manly? The stereotypes are easy: He loves bacon and hot wings and beer. He roars at football games or UFC matches. He smokes cigars. He fishes. He has a man cave. He wears camouflage. He drives a big or fast car. He intimidates other men. He never backs down. He never […]

A couple months ago, Kerry chose the worst possible moment to utter what were already dangerous words for any man to say to a woman: “I really want you to learn to cook.” After he apologized for his timing and I got over it, I admitted to myself and him that it was a very […]

I’ve gotten to know God differently through the loss of our two babes. He has been very present, very comforting, very gracious in the midst of loss. I knew that about God before, but had never known it from experience. It’s different. It’s deeper. It provokes a deeper love and trust of him. And I […]

Our children. Luke’s death has impacted that big question we’ve been wrestling with: “How many? How will we know when to stop?” Before our miscarriages, I took for granted that we could have as many as we wanted. They came every year. Our thoughts were more about how and when to limit these blessings than […]

If we’re not careful, we can find ourselves being better parents to the children we’ve lost than we are to the ones who live under our roof. Luke will always seem innocent, sweet and sinless in our eyes. It’s easy to be patient with him. And we never have to feel the weight of our […]